Please Do Now:
- Answer #1-5 as a comment to this post:
Today students will:
- Learn to eliminate redundancy from writing.
- Read Jesse’s feature article: http://jessekirk11.wordpress.com/2008/11/03/2nd-draft-2/
- Print off a peer review form and fill it out.
- Discuss attribution, features style, and objectivity.
Tonight’s homework is:
- Comment back to this post with answers to #6-10
- Final drafts and reflections are due Monday, November 10 (Packet should include: Cover page, Reflection. Final Draft, J2 peer edits, 2nd Draft, J1 peer edits, First Draft, Notes and Quotes, Planner)
31 responses so far ↓
jessekirk11 // November 3, 2008 at 6:02 pm |
1. Bill is such a prevaricator that you can never count on getting the truth from him.
2. The Blazers’ defensive tackle is a giant who looks almost ready for the pros.
3. Macky, our furry little canine, is named after Mack the Knife because he likes to playfully bite us.
4. Macky is a bundle of energy whose sharp teeth have destroyed two of the family’s pillows on the couch.
5. It was a letdown to discover that the disks for the two computers were not interchangeable.
allisonnovack // November 3, 2008 at 6:03 pm |
1) Bill is such a prevaricating liar.
2) The Blazers’ defensive tackle is enormous in proportion and looks ready for the pros.
3) Macky, our furry little pup is named after Mack the Knife because he likes to playfully bite us.
4) Macky is a bundle of energy whose sharp teeth destroyed two of the family’s sofa pillows.
5) It was disappointing to discover that the disks for the two computers were not interchangable.
jessekirk11 // November 3, 2008 at 6:07 pm |
6. After becoming a celebrity, he wrote an autobiography which became a bestseller.
7. The third grader received a surprise when her mother treated everyone in the whole class to pizza.
8. The innovation in dental care is supposed to be very unique.
9. Byrnehurst French teacher, Mrs. Marie Trudeau, who is a mother-to-be, begins a leave of absence in April.
10. The debut on Friday, Oct. 9, will be the first time the composition is presented to an audience.
Kelsey Sumalla // November 3, 2008 at 6:07 pm |
1.Bill is such a prevaricating liar.
2.The Blazers enormous defensive tackle looks ready for the pros.
3.Macky, our furry little puppy is named after Mack the knife because he likes to playfully bite us.
4.Macky is a bundle of energy whose sharp teeth have totally destroyed two of the family’s sofa pillows.
5.It was disappointing to find out that the disks from the two computers were not interchangeable.
hrynor // November 3, 2008 at 6:08 pm |
1) Bill distorts the truth so often it is impossible to determine if he is telling the truth.
2) The huge giant that is of enormous proportion plays as the Blazers’ defensive tackle.
3) Macky, our furry little puppy, is named after Mack the Knife because he likes to playfully bite us.
4) Macky is a bouncy bundle of energy whose sharp teeth have totally destroyed two of the familiy’s sofa pillows.
5) It was a disappointment to discover that disks for the two computers were not interchangeable with one another.
6)After he had become a famous celebrity he wrote a first – person autobiography which became a bestseller.
7)The third grader received an unexpected surprise on her birthday, when her mother treated the entire class to pizza.
8)The innovation in dental care is supposed to be very unique.
9) Byrnehurst French teacher, Mrs. Marie Trudeau, who is a mother – to – be, begins a leave of absence in April.
10) There will be a debut performanse Friday, October 9.
hrynor // November 3, 2008 at 6:09 pm |
jessicaw2010 // November 3, 2008 at 6:09 pm |
1. Since Bill is a liar dont expect to get true facts from him.
2. The Blazer’s have huge, giant, enormous defensive tackle that look ready for the pros.
3. Our canine pup is named after Mack the Knife since he likes bitting us for fun.
4. Macky has destroyed two of the families sofa pillows with its sharp teeth.
5. It was disappointing when the two disks for the computers weren’t interchangable.
6. He wrote an autobiography about himself after he became famous.
7. The third grader’s mom suprised her when she brought pizza for the whole class on her birthday.
8. There is a unique and new innovation in dental care.
9. Ms. Marie Trudeau, pregnant Byrnehurst French teacher is going to be absent in the month of April.
10. On Friday, October 9th a debut performance will be presented to an audience of people for the first time.
nadineg2012 // November 3, 2008 at 6:11 pm |
1) Bill is such a liar.
The innovation in dental care is supposed to be very unique.
2) The Blazers’ defensive tackle is a giant who looks almost ready for the pros.
3) Macky, our furry little canine pup, is named after Mack the Knife because he likes to bite us, just in fun.
4) Macky is a bouncy bundle of energy whose sharp teeth have totally destroyed two of the family’s sofa pillows.
5) It was disappointing to discover that the disks for the two computers were not interchangeable.
6) After becoming a celebrity, he wrote an autobiography which became a bestseller.
7) The third-grader received a surprise on her birthday when her mother treated the class to pizza.
9) Byrnehurst French Teacher, Mrs. Marie Trudeau, who is pregnant, begins a leave of absence next month.
10) The performance on Friday, October 9 will be the first time the composition is presented to an audience.
hkramer14 // November 3, 2008 at 6:11 pm |
1. Bill is such a liar you can never count on getting the true facts from him.
2. The Blazers’ defensive tackle looks almost ready for the pros.
3. Macky, our furry playful biting pup, is named after Mack the Knife.
4. Macky has so much energy that his sharp teeth has destroyed 2 sofa pillows.
5. It was very disappointing to discover to computer discs were not interchangable with eachother.
6. After becoming a celebrity, he wrote an autobiography which became a bestseller.
7. The third grader received a surprise on her birthday when her mother treated her whole class to pizza.
8. The new technology in dental care is very unique.
9. Byrnehurst french teacher Mrs. Marie Trudeau is pregnant and begins a leave of absence in April.
10. The performance on Friday, October 9th, will be the first time the composition is presented.
hkramer14 // November 3, 2008 at 6:11 pm |
1. Bill is such a liar you can never count on getting the true facts from him.
2. The Blazers’ defensive tackle looks almost ready for the pros.
3. Macky, our furry playful biting pup, is named after Mack the Knife.
4. Macky has so much energy that his sharp teeth has destroyed 2 sofa pillows.
5. It was very disappointing to discover to computer discs were not interchangable with eachother.
6. After becoming a celebrity, he wrote an autobiography which became a bestseller.
7. The third grader received a surprise on her birthday when her mother treated her whole class to pizza.
8. The new technology in dental care is very unique.
9. Byrnehurst french teacher Mrs. Marie Trudeau is pregnant and begins a leave of absence in April.
10. The performance on Friday, October 9th, will be the first time the composition is presented.
carmenk2012 // November 3, 2008 at 6:12 pm |
1. Bill is such a liar that you can never count on getting the truth from him.
2. The Blazers’ defensive tackle looks almost ready for the pros.
3. Macky, our furry pup, is named after Mack the Knife because he likes to playfully bite us.
4. Macky is a bouncy bundle of energy whose sharp teeth have totally destroyed two of the family’s sofa pillows.
5. It was a letdown to discover that disks from the two computers were not interchangeable.
laurenpeterson1 // November 3, 2008 at 6:13 pm |
1.) Bill is such a prevaricating liar.
2,)The Blazers defensive tackle is almost big enough for the pros.
3.)Macky, our furry little puppy is, is named after Mack the Knife because he like to playfully bite it.
4.)Macky is a bundle of energy whose sharp teeth have totally destroyed 2 of the familys sofa pillows.
5.)It was a letdown to discover that the the computer disks were not interchangeable with one another.
6.) After becoming a celebrity, he wrote an autobiography which became a bestseller.
7.) The third grader received a surprise on her birthday when her mother treated her whole class to pizza.
8. )The new technology in dental care is very unique.
9. )Byrnehurst french teacher Mrs. Marie Trudeau is pregnant and begins a leave of absence in April.
10.) The performance on Friday, October 9th, will be the first time the composition is presented.
7y13r // November 3, 2008 at 6:14 pm |
1. Bill is such a liar whose facts can’t be trusted.
2. The Blazers’ giant defensive tackle looks almost ready for the pros.
3. Macky, our puppy, is named after Mack the Knife because he likes to playfully bite us.
4. Macky is a bundle of energy whose sharp teeth destroyed two of the family’s sofa pillows.
5. Discovering that the discs for the two computers were not interchangeable was a letdown.
madisonjsanders // November 3, 2008 at 6:14 pm |
1. Bill is such a prevaricating liar that you can never count on getting the facts from him.
2. The Blazers’ defensive tackle has enormous proportions that look almost ready for the pros.
3. Macky, our furry canine pup, is named after Mack the Knife because he likes to playfully bite us.
4. Macky is a bundle of energy whose sharp teeth have totally destroyed two of the family’s sofa pillows.
5. It was a letdown to discover that disks for the two computers were not interchangeable.
6. After becoming a celebrity he wrote a first-person autobiography of his life which became a popular bestseller.
7. The third grader received a surprise on her birthday when her mother treated the entire class to pizza.
8. The innovation in dental care is supposed to be unique.
9. Byrnehurst French teacher, Mrs. Marie Trudeau, who is pregnant, begins a leave of absence in the coming April.
10. The performance on Friday, October 9, will be the first time the company is presented to an audience.
Felicia Dejean // November 3, 2008 at 6:14 pm |
1. Bill is a liar.
2. The Blazers’ defensive tackle is so huge that he looks like he is almost ready for the pros.
3.Our puppy Macky, is named after Mack the Knife because he likes to playfully bite us.
4.Macky is so energentic that with his sharp teeth he totally destoryed our couch.
5. It was disappointing to find out that the disk for the two computers were not interchangeable.
6. After becoming a celebrity he wrote an autobiography which because a bestseller.
kevins2011 // November 3, 2008 at 6:14 pm |
1. Bill is such a liar that you can never count on getting the facts from him.
2. The Blazers’ defensive tackle is a giant who looks almost ready for the pros.
3. Macky, our furry canine pup, is named after Mack the Knife because he likes to playfully bite us.
4. Macky is a bundle of energy whose sharp teeth have totally destroyed two of the family’s sofa pillows.
5. It was a letdown to discover that disks for the two computers were not interchangable.
6. After becoming a celebrity, he wrote an autobiography that became a bestseller.
7. The third grader received a surprise on her birthday when her mother treated everyone in the class to pizza.
8. The innovation in dental care is supposed to be very unique.
alicel2011 // November 3, 2008 at 6:14 pm |
1.Redundant words-true, prevaricating.
Bill is such a liar that you can never count on getting the facts from him.
2.Redundant words- huge,
The Blazer’s defensive tackle is in enourmous proportions who looks almost ready for the pros.
3.little,fun
Macky, our furry canine pup, is named after Mack theKnife because he likes to playfully bite us just in.
4.totally,couch
Macky is a bundle of energy whose sharp teeth have destroyed two of the familiy’s sofa pillows.
5. dissapointing
It was a letdown to discover that the disks for the two computers were not interchangeable with one another.
LyssaG2011 // November 3, 2008 at 6:14 pm |
1) Bill is a liar.
The innovation in dental care is supposed to be very unique.
Redundancy: prevaricating, can never count on getting true facts from him
2) The Blazers’ defensive takle is a giant who looks almost ready for the pros.
Redundancy: huge, enormous proportions
3) Macky, our furry pup, is named after Mack the Knife because he likes to playfully bite us.
Redundancy: little canine, just in fun
4) Macy is a bundle of energy whose sharp teeth have totally destroyed two of the family’s sofa pillows.
Redundancy: bouncy, on their couch
5) It was a letdown to discover that disks for the two computers were not interchangeable.
Redundancy: with one another
6) After becoming a celebrity he wrote an autobiography which became a bestseller.
Redundancy: famous, first-person, of his life, popular
7) The third grader received a surprise on her birthday when her mother treated the whole class to pizza.
Redundancy: elementary school, unexpected, everyone
Redundancy: new
9) Pregnant Byrnehurst French teacher, Mrs. Marie Trudeau begins a leave of absence in April.
Redundancy: mother-to-be, coming month
10) The performance debuted Friday, October 9.
Redundancy: the first time the composition…
gwenxawesome // November 3, 2008 at 6:14 pm |
1. Bill is so prevericate that you can never count on getting the true facts from him.
2. The Balzer’s defensive tackle looks almost ready for the Pros.
3. Macky, furry little canine is named after Mack the knife because he likes to playfully bite us.
4. Macky is a bundle of energy, his sharp teeth has destryoed two of the sofa pillows.
5. It was a dissapoinment to discover the discs were not interchaengle.
RayL2012 // November 3, 2008 at 6:16 pm |
1. Prevaricating. Bill is always bending the truth, you can never count on Bill.
2. Proportions. The Blazers’ defensive is a massive man who could be in the pro’s,
3. Mak our canine puppy is always so playful, by biting, us
4. Macky is full of energy and has already torn up two pillows.
5. It was a disappointing discovery that disks for the two computer were not interchangeble.
6. A famous celeberty, wrote a first person auto biography, which became a bestseller
7. The third grader recieved a suprise pizza party from her mother.
8. The new innovation in dental care is unique
9. Byrnhust french teacher, mrs. Maric Truede, leaves in april becasue of being pregnant.
10. The preformance, oct. 9, will be the first time the composition is presented.
brittanywaserstein // November 3, 2008 at 6:20 pm |
1. Noone can account on getting true facts from Bill, since he is a liar.
2. Defensive tackle Blazer has proportions like a giant, just like a pro.
3. Our Canine pup, Macky, gets the name from Mack the knife from the way he bites us for fun.
4. Macky destroyed two of the family’s sofa pillows with his sharp teeth.
5. It was disappointing that disks for the two computers werent interchangeable.
6. After he became a famous celebrity he wrote a first-person autobiography, which became a bestseller.
7. The third graders mom brought pizza for the class, which suprised her on her birthday.
8. The dental care’s new innovation is unique.
9. Byrenhurst French teacher, Ms. Marie Trudeau, will be absent in April due to her pregnancy.
10. The debut performance, first time presented to an audience of people, will be Friday, October 9.
molliee // November 3, 2008 at 6:25 pm |
1. Bill is a prevaricing liar, dont count on facts from him.
2. The Blazers defensive tackle is a huge giant of enormous proportions.
3. Macky, our furry pup, is named after Mack the Knife because he likes to playfully bite us.
4. Macky is a bundle of energy whose sharp teeth have destroyed two of the family’s sofa pillows.
5. It was a letdown to discover that disks from the two computers were not interchangeable.
6.After becoming a celebrity, he wrote an autobiography which became a bestseller.
7. The third grader received a surprise on her birthday when her mother treated the whole class to pizza.
8. The innovation in dental care is supposed to be very unique.
9. Byrnehurst French Teacher, Mrs. Marie Trudeau, who is pregnant, begins a leave of absence next month.
10. There will be a debut performanse Friday, October 9.
patrickquinlan // November 3, 2008 at 6:25 pm |
1.Bill is such a prevaricating liar that you can never count on getting the true facts from him.
Bill is a liar.
2.The Blazer’s defensive tackle is a huge giant of enormous proportions who looks almost ready for the pros.
The blazer’s giant defensive tackle looks almost ready for the pros.
3.Macky, our furry little canine pup, is named for Mack the Knife because he likes to bite us playfully, just in fun.
Because he enjoys biting us playfully, Macky, our furry pup is named for Mack the knife.
4.Macky is a bouncy bundle of energy whose sharp teeth have totally destroyed two of the family’s sofa pillows on the couch.
Macky is a bundle of energy whose teeth have destroyed 2 of the family’s sofa pillows.
5.It was a disappointing letdown to discover that disks for the 2 computers were not interchangeable with each other.
It was disappointing to discover that the disks for the 2 computers were not interchangeable.
xkatastrophe // November 3, 2008 at 6:27 pm |
1. You can never count of getting true facts from Bill.
Redundant words: prevacating because it simply means that he is not saying the truth so it’s not needed.
2. The Blazer’s huge defensive tackle made him almost look ready for the pro’s.
Redundant words: huge giant, its implied by “enormous proportions” therefore not needed.
3. Our furry little puppy, Macky, is named after Mack the Knife because he likes to playfully bite us.
Redundant words: just for fun, because playfully was already stated, as well as canine, since it was already said that Mackey was a puppy.
4. Mackey is a bundle of energy whose sharp teeth destroyed two sofa pillows.
Redundant words: on the couch, cause if it’s a sofa pillow then obviously its on the couch, as well as bouncy.
kevins2011 // November 3, 2008 at 6:42 pm |
9. Byrnehurst French teacher, Mrs. Marie Trudeau, who is a mother-to-be, begins a leave in the month of April.
10. The performance Friday, Oct. 9, will be the first time the composition is presented to an audience.
gwenxawesome // November 4, 2008 at 1:07 pm |
6.After becoming a celebrity, he wrote an autobiography which became a bestseller.
7. The third grader received a surprise on her birthday when her mother treated the whole class to pizza.
8. The innovation in dental care is supposed to be very unique.
9. Byrnehurst French Teacher, Mrs. Marie Trudeau, who is pregnant, begins a leave of absence next month.
10. The performance on Friday, October 9, will be the first time it is presented to an audience.
rachelcoller // November 4, 2008 at 2:56 pm |
1. Bill is such a liar.
2. The Blazer’s defensive tackle is a huge giant who looks almost ready for the pros.
3. Macky, our furry little canine pup, is named after Mack the Knife because he likes to playfully bite us.
4. Macky is a bouncy bundle of energy whose sharp teeth have totally destroyed two of the family’s sofa pillows.
5. It was disappointing to discover that disks for the two computers were not interchangeable.
6. After becoming a celebrity he wrote an autobiography which became a bestseller.
7. The third grader received a surprise on her birthday when her mother treated the class to pizza.
8. The innovation in dental care is supposed to be very unique.
9. The performance of Friday, October 9, will be the first time the composition is presented to an audience.
10. Byrnehurst French Teacher, Mrs. Marie Trideau, who is pregnant, begins a leave of absence in April.
Kelsey Sumalla // November 5, 2008 at 10:37 pm |
6. After becoming a celebrity, he wrote a bestseller autobiography.
7. A third grader received a surprise on her birthday when her mother treated the class to pizza.
8. The innovation in dental care is supposed to be unique.
9. A pregnant Byrnehurst French teacher, Mrs. Marie Trudeau, begins a leave of absence in April.
10. A debut performance for the composition will be on Friday, October 9.
alicel2011 // November 5, 2008 at 11:46 pm |
6. After becoming a celebrity he wrote a fisrt-person autobiography of his life which became a bestseller.
7.The third grader received a surprise on her birthday when her mother treated everyone in the class to pizza.
8. The innovation in dental care is supposed to be very unique.
9.Byrenhurst French teacher, Mrs. Maria Trrudeau,who is pregnant begins a leave of absence in April.
10. The performance on Friday, Oct.9, will be the first time the composition is presented to an audience of people.
lenac2011 // November 6, 2008 at 12:11 am |
1. Bill is a liar that can never be counted on for true facts.
2. The Blazer’s defensive tackle has enormous proportions and look almost ready for the pros.
3. Macky, our furry pup is named after Mack the Knife because he likes to playfully bite us.
4. Macky is a bundle of energy whose sharp teeth have totally destroyed two of the family’s sofa pillows.
5. It was a letdown to discover that disks for the two computers were not interchangeable.
6. After becoming a celebrity he wrote an autobiography which became a bestseller.
7. The third grader received a surprise on her birthday when her mother treated the whole class to pizza.
8. The innovation in dental care is supposed to be unique.
9. Byrnehurst French teacher, Mrs. Marie Trudeau, who is a mother-to-be, begins a leave of absence in the coming month of April.
10. The performance Friday, Oct. 9, will be the first time the composition is presented to an audience of people.
carmenk2012 // November 6, 2008 at 1:06 am |
6. After becoming a celebrity he wrote an autobiography which became a bestseller.
7. The third grader received a surprise on her birthday when her mother treated the whole class to pizza.
8. There was an innovation in dental care.
9. Brynehurst French teacher, Mrs. Marie Trudeau, begins a leave of absence in the coming month of April due to her pregnancy.
10. Friday, October 9th, will be the first time that the composition is presented to an audience.