Please Do Now:
- Click on the following article from last year’s Beachcomber to read it:
- What are the 5 W’s and an H?
- Rewrite the lede in your own words
- Identify one direct quote, front attribution
- Identify one direct quote, middle attribution
- Identify one direct quote, end attribution
- Identify one indirect quote (hint: it’s not from a person)
- Identify one partial quote
- Do you think this article is objective or biased? Why?
- What is the structure of this article? Describe it.
Today, students will:
- Review principles of journalism learned so far (5 W’s& H, Lede, Quotes, Attribution, Objectivity, Structure).
- Discuss some common pitfalls of student journalism (When asked… Our / We… Mr / Ms… Wordiness / Voice… Precision and economy of language)
- Workshop Helen’s First Draft: http://hrynor.wordpress.com/2008/09/17/first-draft/
Tonight’s homework is:
- First Drafts are due Tuesday before class begins. THERE ARE NO EXCEPTIONS TO THIS DEADLINE!
- First drafts should be approximately 250-500 words in length. Ask me if you have questions on your specific word limit.
19 responses so far ↓
allisonnovack // September 19, 2008 at 5:23 pm |
2 What: MBSH uniforms
Where: MBSH
When: April 2008 (End of last school year.)
Why: The parents voted on uniforms; it was about a 2 to 1 ratio.
Who: MBSH involved people. Uniform committee, students, parents
How: The parents voted; contraversial
3 Lede: On April 29, Dr. Sidener announced that the MBSH students will have to wear students next year due to the fact that the parents voted for it.
4 According to Sahwell, “individuality can be expressed in many ways while wearing similar clothing.”
5 “High school is a place where you can express your individuality-who you are, and grow as a person” she said. “Uniforms only restrain and restrict you from that.”
6 “The plan is for shirts to be ready by orientation.” said Mike Perry
7 It issued a statement that uniforms will consist of red, white, or silver colored t-shirts….
8 Kristeen Pawly described the logos submitted as “boring.”
9 I do not think this is objective or biased. The author presented two sides to the argument of whether the uniforms are a good thing or not. They interviewed teachers, and students.
10 This article starts by stating the facts of the election for uniforms. It then talks about how the steps happen with the commitee. It then quotes teachers and students about it.
lenac2011 // September 19, 2008 at 5:30 pm |
1. Who: Students, Teachers and Administrators
What: The uniform policy
Where: Miami Beach High
When: The end of the 07-08 school year
Why: Dr. Sidener thought having kids in school uniform would improve the school’s image
How: Parents voted
2. Lede: At the end of the day on April 29 Principal Rosann Sidener announced the results of the uniform vote.
3. Direct quote, front: According to Sahwell, “individuality can be expressed in many ways while wearing similar clothing.”
4. Direct quote, middle: “I think having kids in school colors improves the image of the school and tend to works better,” she said. “When everyone looks good you feel a sense of pride.”
5. Direct quote, end: “It’s cheaper, simpler, cleaner, brings equality to the school, and isn’t distracting,” said sophomore Rachel Belensz.
6. Indirect: Principal Rosann Sidener announced the results of the uniform vote at the end of the day on April 29.
7. Partial quote: Junior Kristeen Pawly described the logos submitted for the contest as “boring.”
8. I think this article is objective because it shows both sides of opinions of the issue of the uniforms.
9. The structure of the article has beginning information about the uniform and then ends with quotes from students and teachers and more information.
kevins2011 // September 19, 2008 at 5:31 pm |
Who: Students at Miami Beach High
What: They will be required to wear uniforms for the 2008-2009 school year
When: End of the 2007-2008 school year
Where: Miami Beach High
Why: The principal did not enjoy the clothes students were wearing
How: By having the parents take a vote on the uniforms
After a 155 to 233 vote on uniforms, Dr. Rosann Sidener announced that students at Miami Beach Senior High will be wearing uniforms for the 2008-2009 school year.
Direct quote, front attribution:
According to Sahwell, “individuality can be expressed in many ways while wearing similar clothing.”
Direct quote, middle attribution:
“I think it will make the school look better and maybe the FCAT scores will go up,” said freshman Nicole Bonifaz” students will concentrate more on school than on judging other people’s looks.”
Direct quote, end attribution:
“It’s cheaper, simpler, cleaner, brings equality to the school, and isn’t distracting,” said sophomore Rachael Belensz
Indirect quote:
Principal Rosann Sidener announced the results of the uniform vote at the end of the day on April 29.
Partial quote:
…but according to Sahwell, the few entries that were submitted were, “extremely unoriginal.”
I believe this article is objective because the author did not show whether they wanted uniforms or not and put quotes by people on both sides.
In this article, they start off with the main point, then they go into further detail with the main point, and finally they give students’ and teachers’ opinions.
jessicaw2010 // September 19, 2008 at 5:32 pm |
2)
Who: Miami Beach Senior High students
What: regarding the uniform policy and votes deciding whether to have one or not
Where: Miami Beach
When: April 29
Why: students didnt necesarily dress well and it was said that students came to school to learn and teachers came to school to teach
How: there was a comittee made up of students, parents and teachers who held a vote for the uniform policy
3) On April 29th, Principal Rosann Sidener announced the results for the uniform vote.
4) According to Sawhell, “individuality can be expressed in many ways while wearing similar clothing.”
5) “High school is a place where you can express your individuality- who you are- and grow as a person,” she said. “Uniforms only restrain and restrict you from that.”
6) “It’s cheaper, simpler, cleaner, brings equality to the school, and isn’t distracting,” said Rachael Belensz.
7) “Parents voted, they sent their ballots in and wanted their voice to be heard.”
9) I think is article is objective because it doesn’t really go against the people who disagreed and didnt want the uniform policy. This article was more of trying to introduce the uniform policy and explain why it was chosen.
10) This article starts off with a quote by the principal of the school. It gives information about what the article is based on and both direct and indirect quotes from people from Miami Beach Senior Highschool.
brittanywaserstein // September 19, 2008 at 5:36 pm |
Who: MBSH students
What: uniform approved for next school year
where: Miami Beach senior high
When: April 29
Why: there was a vote on whether there should be uniforms or not and the majority voted yes. Parents were the ones who voted.
How: the parents voted
Lede: Principal Rosann Sidener announced that according to all the votes, there will be uniforms next year.
One direct quote-front attribution:
Principal Rosann Sidener said, “I think having kids in school colors improve the image of the school and tends to work better.”
One direct quote-middle attribution:
“High school is a place where you can express your individuality -who you are- and grow as a person,” she said. “Uniforms only restrain and restrict you from that.”
One direct quote-end attribution:
“The simple M.B.S.H will make the clothes seem more like a brand than a uniform. I like to think of it as ‘professional school apparel’”, said Sahwell.
One indirect quote:
“Priar to the vote, it issued a statement that uniforms would consist of red, white or silver colored t-shirts or polos. Bottoms would be black, khacki or denim no higher then mid-knee.”
One partial quote:
Junior Kristeen Pawly described the logos for the contest as “boring”.
9) I think that this article is objective because when the students made their opinions about the uniforms there wasnt anyone to argue with them. Also, the author put quotes in which students were for the uniform and students who were against the uniforms.
10) The structure of this article starts with the final results of the uniform and what it consists of. It then shows the opinions of students, Mrs. Sahwell and principal Rosann Sidner by quoting what they had to say.
xkatastrophe // September 19, 2008 at 5:37 pm |
- Who: Beach High students
-What: Beach High students will have a mandatory uniform policy for the 08-09 school year.
-Where: Beach High
-When: The vote results came in on April 29, 2008.
-Why: Some people believed it would make the FCAT scores go up, bring more equality, and students can focus more on academics instead of what they wear to school.
How: The uniform commitee voted and uniforms were voted in 233-155 votes.
- Rewritten lede; On April 29 2008, Dr Rosann Sidener announced that uniforms will be mandatory for the upcoming school year by vote of the uniform commitee.
-Direct quote front attribution; “The decision for the school uniforms was soley based, as per School Board rules, on parental vote”
-Direct quote middle attribution; “The simple M.B.S.H will make clothes seem more like a brand than a uniform. I like to think of it as ‘professional school apparel’”
-Direct quote end attribution; “I think it will make the school look better and maybe the FCAT scores will go up”
-Indirect quote; “There were not very many discrepancies concerning the uniform policy; most students agreed”
-Partial quote; “High school is a place where you can express your individuality…. uniforms restrain and restrict you from that”
-I do believe this article was a bit biased towards the end, since they added several quotes about how good it was but only gave one on how bad it was.
-The structure of the article started out with the day it was announced, followed by how it happened, the logo, the plans for distribution, ending with quotes from students and their views on it.
LyssaG2011 // September 19, 2008 at 5:38 pm |
Who- Principal Rosann Sidener
What- Announced the results of the uniform vote
Where- Miami Beach Senior High
When- End of day on April 29
Why- Vote was passed with 233 to 155
Lede- The results of the uniform vote were announced by Principal Rosann Sidener at the end of the day on April 29.
Direct quote, front attribution- According to Sahwell, “individuality can be expressed in many ways while wearing similar clothing.”
Direct quote, middle attribution – “The decision for the school uniforms were solely based, as per School Board Rules, on parental vote,” said Maria Sahwell, co-chair of the uniform committee, “Parents voted, they sent their ballots in and wanted their voices to be heard.”
Direct quote, end attribution- “…I like to think of it as’professional school apparel,’” said Sahwell.
Indirect quote- …It issued a statement that uniforms would consist of red, white or silver colored t-shirts of polos.
Partial quote- Junior Kristeen Pawly described the logos submitted for the contest as “boring.”
Objective or biased?- The article is objective because, as a news article, it needs to tell the facts and give people’s opinions on both sides. For example, there are quotes by people who approve and disapprove of the uniform.
Structure- It used the inverted pyramid by giving you the most important information in the first sentence and having the least important statements near the end.
patrickquinlan // September 19, 2008 at 5:43 pm |
Who: Dr. Sidener and (then) next year’s students
What: The next school year will have a uniform, as decided by The beach high parents
Where: MBSH
When: 08-09 school year
Why: because the parents voted in favor of the measure
How: they picked up ballots (if they wanted to) when they picked up their chiold’s report card early, On April 29
Lede: On April 29, Dr. Sidener tallied the vote for next year’s uniform policy, and it’s official. MBSH will have Unifroms, because of the parental vote
Direct Quote: Junior Myriaha Diaz disagreed ” High school is a place where you can express your individuality- who you are- and grow up as a person.”
Direct Quote: “I think having the kids in school colors improve the image of the school”, She said. “When everyone looks good, you feel a sense of pride”
Direct quote: “Its’s cheaper, simpler, cleaner, brings a qualitity to the school, and isin’t as distracting”, said sophmore Rachel Belensz.
Indirect Quote: A survey of 5 High Schools in miami dade county revealed an average price of 15-18$ per polo shirt
Partial Quote: Junior Kristeen Pawly descibed the logos as… “Boring”
I believe that the aritcle is objective because they showed opposing arguments and displayed basic facts that were unbiased.
The article is broken up into the topic, and then multiple reactions, qoutes and arguments about the original topic; a basic inverted pyramid, ending with a quote in favor of the argument
RayL2012 // September 19, 2008 at 5:44 pm |
Who: Principle Sidener, Kids at MBSH, teachers and Parents
What: Annonced That there will be uniforms for the upcoming year (this year)
Where:Miami Beach Senior High
why: The parents voted for it. They (including some students) said that it would be nice to have uniforms because it wouldnt distract kids from their school work
when: April 29 (Before school)
How: The school uniform was voted on and the uniform took the favorable vote.
Lede:Principle Rosann Sidener announced the ballet dictation of the school uniform vote. The uniform policy passed at 233 to 155 on april 29. Miami Beach Senior High will now have uniforms along with the other 65% of Miami Dade schools.
Direct Quotes
Front: Junior Myriaha Diaz disagreed “High school is a place where you can express your inviduality- who you are-and grow as a person”
Middle: “The desicionfor the school uniforms were soley based, as per school board rules, on parentsl vote” said Maria Sawell co chair of the uniform commitee “Parents voted, they sent their ballots in and wanted their voice to be heard” (end Quote)
End: The simple MBSH will make the clothes seem more like a brand then a uniform. I like to think ofit as “Profesional School apparel” Said Sawell.
Identify one partial quote : “High school is a place where you can express your individuality…. uniforms restrain and restrict you from that”
Identify one indirect quote: “There were not very many discrepancies concerning the uniform policy; most students agreed”
Objective or Biased:This article doesnt seem biased because the author doesnt really take sides he just states what other peolple have said and doesnt raelly take a side.
Structure: He used the inverted triangle beacause he gave us the most important information at the top of the article and then leading to the not important areas.
hrynor // September 19, 2008 at 6:29 pm |
1. What are the 5 W’s and an H?
Who – Principle Rosann Sidener
What – Approved uniforms for the coming year
Where – Miami Beach Senior High School
When – The following year (That is when the uniforms will be required)
Why – Because it will improve the look of the school
How – The parents voted for uniforms and pro uniforms won
2. Rewrite the lede in your own words
The uniform policy passed announced Rosann Sidener said, principle, on April 29.
3. Identify one direct quote, front attribution
According to Sahwell, “individuality can be expressed in many ways while wearing similar clothing.”
4. Identify one direct quote, middle attribution
“I think having kids in school colors improves the image of the school and tends to work better,” she said “When everyone looks good you feel a sense of pride.”
5. Identify one direct quote, end attribution
“The simple M.B.S.H. will make the clothes seem more like a brand than a uniform. I like to think of it as “professional school apparel,”” said Sahwell
6. Identify one indirect quote (hint: it’s not from a person)
It issued a statement that uniform would consist of red, white, or silver colored t-shirt or polo.
7. Identify one partial quote
Junior Kristeen Pawly described the logos submitted for the contest as “boring.”
8. Do you think this article is objective or biased? Why?
I think this article is objective because it shows both sides of the argument, and the authors didn’t state their sides on the uniform decision.
9. What is the structure of this article? Describe it.
It is structured as an inverted pyramid. The most important information is said first and the less important and interesting information comes later on in the article.
rachelcoller // September 19, 2008 at 6:32 pm |
Who: Students at Miami Beach Senior High
What: New uniforms at Beach High
When: April 29th 2008
Where: Miami Beach Senior High
Why: School colors tend to improve the image of the school, everyone looks good and has a sense of pride
How: The parents voted and the results were 233 to 155 causing the uniforms to be mandatory.
On April 29, 2008, the parents voted 233-155 to make uniforms mandatory in order for the student body to look good and have a sense of pride.
Front attribution: Junior Myriaha Diaz disagreed. “High school is a place where you can express your individuality- who you are- and grow as a person.”
Indirect quote: It issued a statement that uniforms would consist of red, white or silver colored t-shirts or polos
Partial quote: Junior Kristen Pawly described the logos submitted for the constest as “boring.”
This article is objective because the journalist included both positive and negative views on the new uniforms.
middle attribution: Sidner endores the decision “I think having kids in school colors improves the image of the school and tends to work better,” she said “when everyone looks good, you feel a sense of pride.”
end attribution: “Its cheaper, simpler, cleaner, bring equality to the school and isn’t distracting.” Said sophmore Rachel Belensz
Kelsey Sumalla // September 19, 2008 at 6:32 pm |
Who: Dr. Sidener, students, and teachers of MBSH
What: Uniforms being approved
Where: Miami Beach Senior High
When: April 29
Why: Kids in school colors improves the image of the school, they tend to work better, and you feel a sense of pride.
How: Parents voted and the results were 233 to 155
Lede: On April 29 Principal Rosann Sidener announced that Miami Beach Senior High would be joining the other 65% of Miami schools that have a mandatory uniform policy. The parents voted and the policy passed by a vote of 233 to 155.
direct quote front: Junior Myriaha Diaz disagreed. “High school is a place where you can express your individuality – who you are – and grow as a person”
direct middle: Sidener endorsed the decision. “I think having kids in school colors improve the image of the school and tends to work better,” she said. “When everyone looks good you feel a sense of pride.”
direct end: “The simple M.B.H.S. will make the colors seem more like a brand than a uniform. I like to think of it as ‘professional school apparel’”, said Sahwell.
indirect: Prior to the vote it issued a statement that uniforms would consist of red, white, and silver colored t-shirts or polos.
partial: Junior Kristeen Pawly described the logos submitted were “extremely unoriginal”
I think it is biased because it has more quotes on
hkramer14 // September 19, 2008 at 6:32 pm |
2. Who-Students, Parents, and Uniform Committee of MBSH
What-The voting on the uniforms for 08-09 School Year
Where-MBSH
When-April 29th, 2008
Why-To have equality among the students
How-233-155 parents voted yes
3. On April 29th, 2008, Parents of MBHS voted 233-155 to enforce uniforms for the 2008- 2009 school year, to have equality among the students.
4. According to Myriasha Diaz, a junior, “high school is a place where you can express your individuality.”
5. “I think having kids in school colors improve the image of the school and tends to work better,”she said.”When everyone looks good you feel a sense of pride.”
6. “The plan is for shirts to be ready by orientation.” said Mike Perry.
7. It issued a statement that uniforms will consist of red, white, or silver color t-shirts.
8. Kristeen Pawly described the logos submitted submitted as “boring”
9. I don’t really think this article is objective or biased. The writer gave a sufficient amount of evidence to support both sides.
10. The article starts off by stating the facts of the election for the new uniforms. Then it goes into the quotes stated by the teachers and students.
nadineg2012 // September 20, 2008 at 3:25 am |
2. Who: MBSH students
What: Will have to wear school uniforms.
Where: MBSH
When: Beginning next school year, as announced on April 29th.
Why: Parents voted in favor of the uniforms.
How: By a 233 to 155 vote.
3. Following a vote of 233 to 155 in favor of the proposed uniform, Dr. Sidener announced on April 29th that Beach High will be a uniform school beginning next school year.
4. According to Sahwell, “individuality can be expressed in many ways while wearing similar clothing.”
5. “I think having kids in school colors improve the image of the school and tends to work better,” she said. “When everyone looks good, you feel a sense of pride.”
6. “The plan is for shirts to be ready for orientation,” said Mike Perry, co-chair of the uniform committee.
7. Prior to the vote, it issued a statement that uniforms would consist of red, white, or silver colored t-shirts or polos.
8. … but according to Sahwell, the few entries that were submitted were, “extremely unoriginal.”
9. I think the article is neither completely biased nor completely objective. The authors present both positive and negative opinions about the uniform policy, from teachers and students, but there are more quotes from those in favor of the policy.
10. The article uses the inverted pyramid structure, stating the most important information at the beginning, and the least important facts/quotes at the end.
Alice // September 21, 2008 at 1:59 am |
Who: MBSH students
What: Have to wear uniforms
When: Begining next year said on April 29
Where: at MBSH
Why: For more equality on school with students
How: By the parents voting 233 to 155.
Rewritten Lead- Starting next year MBSH students will be a uniform school. This was announced by Rossan Sidener on April 29; the policy vote was 233 to 155.
Direct Quote Front attibution- According to Sahwell,” Inviduality can be expressed in many ways, while wearing similar clothing.”
Direct quote middle attribution-” I think having kids in school improve the image of school and tends to work better,” she said ” When everyone looks good you feel a sense of pride.”
Direct quote end attribution- ” The plan is for shirts to be ready for orientation.” said Mike Perry co-chair of the uniform comitee
Indirect quote- ” It issued a statement that uniforms would consist of red,white, or silver t-shirts or polos. Bottoms would be black, khaki, or denim no higher than mid-knee.”
Partial quote- “… will make the clothes seem more like a brand than a uniform…”
I think that the author is not being biased nor objective. It gives both sides to the story.
The article structure is the Inverted pyramid. First it gives the most important detail then it gives the details.
laurenpeterson1 // September 21, 2008 at 2:28 am |
Who: Students, Teachers and Administrators
What: The uniform policy
Where: Miami Beach High
When: The end of the 07-08 school year
Why: Dr. Sidener thought having kids in school uniform would improve the school’s image
How: Parents voted
2. Lede: At the end of the day on April 29 Principal Rosann Sidener announced the results of the uniform vote.
3. Direct quote, front: According to Sahwell, “individuality can be expressed in many ways while wearing similar clothing.”
4. Direct quote, middle: “I think having kids in school colors improves the image of the school and tend to works better,” she said. “When everyone looks good you feel a sense of pride.”
5. Direct quote, end: “It’s cheaper, simpler, cleaner, brings equality to the school, and isn’t distracting,” said sophomore Rachel Belensz.
6. Indirect: Principal Rosann Sidener announced the results of the uniform vote at the end of the day on April 29.
7. Partial quote: Junior Kristeen Pawly described the logos submitted for the contest as “boring.”
8. I think this article is objective because it shows both sides of opinions of the issue of the uniforms.
9. The structure of the article has beginning information about the uniform and then ends with quotes from students and teachers and more information.
jessekirk11 // September 21, 2008 at 6:25 pm |
Who: Parents of students at Miami Beach High, as well as the students affected
What: The vote to decide whether or not there would be uniforms.
Where: Miami Beach High
When: April 29
Why: To decide if there would be uniforms
How: By a vote of 233:155
Lede: On April 29, Rosann Sidener announced that Miami Beach High parents had voted in favor of uniforms by a vote of 233:155.
Direct Quote, Front Attribution: According to Sahwell, “individuality can be expressed in many ways while wearing similar clothing.”
Direct Quote, Middle Attribution: “I think having kids in school colors improves the image of the school and tend to works better,” she said. “When everyone looks good you feel a sense of pride.”
Direct Quote, end attribution “We plan to meet with the vendors to reach an equitable price,” he said.
Indirect: Prior to the vote, it issued a statement that uniforms would consist of red, whit, or silver colored t-shirts or polos.
Partial: Sahwell feels that “school is a place where students come to learn and teachers to teach.”
The article is objective because it shows a variety of different viewpoints and is merely stating the facts, not personal opinions.
The article starts with the most important, basic facts, and progresses to more minute details and opinions.
Kelsey Sumalla // September 22, 2008 at 10:08 pm |
I think it is biased because it has more quotes on how the uniform is a bad idea.
The structure of the article is like an inverted pyramid. It starts out with the most important information about the uniforms and then ends with some quotes from students.
Kelsey Sumalla // September 22, 2008 at 10:08 pm |
that was the continuation